As a result of my past, I have had the most difficult time expressing my true emotions. It seems, that by the time I’m comfortable with saying how I really feel, I’m too late. And while this has been a repeat pattern in my life, I am still not able to speed up the process.

In prayer, I have asked the Lord to help me. And, I’ve gotten better. I’m still not “fast enough.” For the past few years, I’ve lived my life behind a fortified wall of protection. But, now, due to a particular interest and the effort of a single person, I’ve been living life outside of the wall. Now what?

I feel alone, vulnerable and exposed for all to see. I feel uncomfortable outside of the wall, but on some level, I feel better as well - free. What can I make of this jumble of emotions?

Right now, I do not have the answers. I quite frankly am not sure of what to do. And, so, in this time, I’m going to do the best thing that I can do. Pray and wait for an answer from the Lord. The Bible tells us that God is not the author of confusion – therefore I have to find a way to silence these racing thoughts in my mind. The only way to do that is through utter submission to the will of my Father.

It seems that around every major holiday, there is an attack from my adversary. He always tries something so why I’m not aware and always caught off guard I’m not sure. I guess I need to open my eyes wider! But, now that I’m fully aware of what is going on, I’m determined to fight – on my knees – in prayer. Jesus came, lived, died and rose again so that I could have the access to the Father. I cannot think of a better gift to give Him for His birthday than to show Him my ever increasing faith. Times are emotionally tough for me right now, but I trust God. He is my hope, and my ultimate answer.

If you find yourself going through a bit of emotional roughness during this season, for whatever reason, I do pray that you will turn your eyes upon Jesus now. For He alone is worthy to be worshipped and adored. I pray that you will give Him the gift of your ever increasing faith.

Be Blessed!
Sanya

The Word from the Lord was so strong in Bible Study last night that I just had to share it with you today. I want you to be blessed just as I was! Here are my notes:

Go ahead, take a look at Isaiah Chapter 7. The quick synopsis is that King Ahaz was afraid. He was fearful because Syria and Ephraim were joined together against him. God sent Isaiah to tell Ahaz not to be afraid despite the plans of those plotting against him. Verse 7 says “Thus saith the Lord God, It shall not stand, neither shall it come to pass.” The prophet goes on to tell Ahaz “if ye will not believe, surely ye shall not be established.” The Lord goes on to tell Ahaz to ask for a sign and he would give it to him. But, Ahaz, poor Ahaz, would not do it. He was so fearful. He gave up the opportunity to ask the Lord for a sign because he was either trying to be pious or he really doubted the sent prophet Isaiah. (v12). You can read the rest for yourself. My comments today rest on these verses.

Fear is often made to be a result of weakness. In Ahaz’s case, he was a weak king. However, in our case, in our weakness, our fear should drive us to the Lord. Recall how some of us only come to the Lord when we don’t know what else to do about a situation. Fear drives us to the Lord so in that sense, it’s healthy.

This passage is about someone that is essentially caught between a rock and a hard place. Have you been there? I have. King Ahaz has. He is trying to decide what to do – should he get help from Assyria or rely on the Lord. He can see and touch the help from Assyria, but he cannot do that with the Lord. It becomes a faith issue. God tells King Ahaz not to get help from Assyria but instead to get it from the Lord. He alone knows what we have on our minds and we are to turn it loose. We are to turn those things over to the Lord. When, not if, but, when we have problems, the problem will not last – it will burn out – so we need to be about the business of giving the problem over to the Lord and letting Him work it out. Again – this requires our faith.

The problem with King Ahaz in this passage is that he could not get past the physical to see the spiritual. We need to stay in the realm of the spiritual – stay focused on the things of God! You cannot be a momentary Christian – at least, I don’t recommend it. There are consequences to bear when we fail to trust God. Afterall, without faith it is impossible to please God.

If you will not believe, surely you will not be established. If you will not be sure, you cannot be secure. Or, simply put, unsecure equals insecure.

God is depending on us to be FAITHFUL and represent Him in all that we are going through.
So, those are my notes from Bible Study last night. It is my prayer that we take a moment to re-examine our lives and make sure that our faith rests solely in Him, for He alone is worthy!

I was just surfing the web and I found this link and took the test. It is called Could You Pass Eight Grade Math. Loving the show "Are you smarter than a fifth grader" and often feeling that perhaps I am NOT smarter than a fifth grader (that was sooo long ago), I thought this quiz may be fun. In case you are wondering, I got a perfect score - 10 out of 10. I trust that you will too. If you take the quiz, be sure to post your results here. Come on' - you can do it!

http://www.blogthings.com/couldyoupasseighthgrademathquiz

-sanya